Henry Wadsworth Longfellow supposedly believed that the most precious times were not the holidays on the calendar, but rather those we observe silently, in private. He called them “secret anniversaries of the heart.” These special times are evoked by our senses and— among these senses— scent is one of the most powerful emissaries.
Carol Fenster celebrates Mother's Day with her mother's chocolate cake recipe, converted to gluten-free, of course.
For example, the smell of roses makes me think of my maternal grandmother who used a rose-scented hand lotion. When I think of her I inevitably recall her homemade chocolate cookies that she always had waiting for her visiting grandchildren. (Her 12 children produced lots of visitors!). To this day, I associate those cookies with her and her warm, unconditional love.
Think back over your life and your secret anniversaries. For many of us, certain memories trigger thoughts of food and celebratory times. Perhaps it’s winning the coveted part in a school play . . . or the music that played on your first date or . . . when you found out you were pregnant with your first child…or the day your first child entered kindergarten or graduated from high school.
Maybe it’s a sad memory such as the loss of a parent . . . or the day you learned about a job transfer that took you thousands of miles away from your friends and loved ones . . . or the bittersweet joy of children marrying and moving far away from home.
If these memories—whether they’re happy or sad—evoke thoughts of food, then let those foods be markers for those anniversaries. Though she’s been gone for over 30 years, I still have warm thoughts as I prepare some of my Mother’s favorite recipes—such as the chocolate cake in this photo. Every time I make it, I think of her. And, sometimes I prepare those dishes simply because I have that longing to reconnect with her using food as the medium. You don’t have to explain why you’re serving a particular dish. If it makes you happy or arouses melancholy thoughts that allow you to indulge your feelings, that’s your secret.
Food is a way to celebrate life and the rituals we embrace. So my motto is “Celebrate anything and everything—with food.” As Mother’s Day approaches, many of us will prepare special foods for Mom (or she may prepare them for you!) Embrace the love that’s poured into the effort of preparing food and tuck away one more memory for the future.
What are the secret anniversaries of your heart? What foods or aromas evoke memories for you?
